Watching someone you love struggle with their mental health can be extremely difficult. It can be overwhelming not knowing how to be there for them and it can be stressful wondering if you are doing or saying the right things. The good thing is that you don’t need to be an expert on mental health to offer your support.  Small acts show you are there for them can have a big impact. If you are struggling with how to let someone know you are there for them, here are a few things you can try.

Start a conversation

 Starting up a conversation about someone’s difficulties with mental health is easier said than done. It might be helpful to start the conversation by expressing how worried you are about them and offer a safe place to talk about what they are going through, reassuring them that they do not have to go through this alone.

It is a big step for someone to open up about issues with their mental health so recognising this, letting them lead the conversation at their pace and giving them your full attention is important. However, if someone isn’t ready to talk about it, don’t force it, just let them know you are there for them if they ever want to talk to someone.

It can be helpful to start the conversation whilst doing something together that doesn’t have too many distractions, like going for a walk or cooking a meal. But it is important to make sure that you don’t just talk about their mental health issues when you are with them, try and maintain some normality and talk or do things you would normally do. Their current mental health difficulties don’t define them.

Get familiar

Getting familiar by doing some research on the challenges your loved one is going through is a powerful tool to can help reduce any fears that can stop us from openly talking about it. Breaking down these barriers can help start the conversation about how they want to be supported by you.

In some cases, they may mention something that would help them. However, sometimes they may not know exactly how they want to be helped and that’s okay, just knowing you are there for them may be enough.

Please keep in mind that when you are researching different mental health issues, try and get your information from trusted sources to ensure it is accurate.

Look after yourself

It can be distressing to know that someone you care about is going through a tough time. Even if you have some experience or knowledge of their current challenges, it can sometimes feel like you are not doing enough and that can negatively impact your well-being. Therefore, it is important to recognise your boundaries – looking after your mental well-being allows you to make sure you are there for your loved ones.

Be kind to yourself and do stuff that helps you relax and feel good. Protecting your mental health is just as important as being there for your loved ones.

Extra help

If you feel like your loved one is struggling a lot and would benefit from getting some professional help you could suggest getting in contact with their GP or speaking to a therapist. Remind them that getting help is not a sign of weakness but of strength.  However don’t force them to do something they don’t want to.

If they are in danger and talking about suicide, contact the Samaritans on 116 123 for free or 111/999 if you think they need urgent help.

Final note

Remember there is no ‘one size fits all’ solution to supporting someone with mental health difficulties and recovery is rarely straightforward. But with the small ways you provide support and this is probably making a big difference in their lives.  Even if it sometimes doesn’t feel like you are doing enough.