Making any decision in your life can be stressful, no matter how big or small the stakes are. It can be an extremely overwhelming process trying to work out what the ‘right’ decision is for you. Sometimes it can weigh so heavily on our minds that we miss out on being present in our lives.
So here are 6 things to keep in mind when you are facing a difficult decision or dilemma.
- Accept the process
Sometimes one of the first things you will need to do is to accept that it could take some time to reach your final decision. If we don’t then we could find ourselves struggling even more. It could take a few days, weeks or even months. Everyone is on different timelines for these things so don’t let it add more stress to your life.
- Put the time in
If you are struggling to make a decision it can be helpful to dedicate some time to weigh up your options. Try and limit distractions whilst you are doing this, so you focus all your attention on finding a suitable solution that works for you.
A classic way of doing this is by writing down all your options, no matter how extreme or unrealistic you might think they are. Once you finish this try and think about all the pros and cons of each option. If the emotions attached to your decision are getting too much for you, try and take a breath and view your situation pragmatically – ask your self what would your best friend say?
If you are still stuck maybe talking through your options with someone could help you process your choices.
- Don’t fear mistakes
Remember you always have a choice. Don’t let the fear of the unknown stop you from making a decision. If you realise you made a mistake, it’s not the end of the world as we are rarely stuck with our choices for the rest of our lives.
Throughout life, we discover what we like and dislike along the way and this can be used to influence our decision. We can use what we have learnt from our past choices and mistakes to guide us through our current dilemmas.
- What do you value?
Identifying your values in life can help guide you to make the best decision for you. Your values are things that you believe are important in life. They act like a compass to help you make decisions that you are happy with now and in the future.
If you want some guidance on identifying your values visit our blog discussing this.
- Reflection
With a stressful time, pressure to make your decision can be hard. But take some time to practice some reflection.
You can think about your thoughts and feelings on the situation and explore your different options by visualising what your life would be like before making your decision. This might reveal something you didn’t expect that will help you decide. If it helps you can write this down in a journal.
It will take some time to adapt to any change, so taking the time to reflect can help you process what’s to come.
- Be compassionate
Just keep in mind that whatever you choose to do, your decision will not define you as a person. Decision-making is a skill that needs to be worked on for it to strengthen and improve, but it takes time. You will not be the first person to struggle with making a decision, and you won’t be the last. Acknowledge and make room for the thoughts and feelings that may arise but try not to drown in them.
If negative and unwanted thoughts keep popping into your head, try and unhook yourself from them as they are not going to help you make your final decision. Try to practice some self-compassion towards yourself and your situation. This blog could help you learn some unhooking techniques.
Once you make your decision all the emotions tied up with this decision won’t go straight away. So, take some time afterwards to practice self-compassion and congratulate yourself for making that tough decision.
If you need some support with this, you could consider psychology. Contact us
